PM me if this is too revealing and you want this deleted:
Was this story published in Allergic Living? I was reading it and it sounded eerily familiar.

Wow.. I'm glad she's ok now. I have seen so many restaurant workers/owners not taking food allergies serious. If I even sense they are bluffing or give me the "oh, one of these people" looks, I run for the hills.

Hi, Everyone ... I just wanted to thank you all for your kindness and support.  To all those who responded to my post, and even to those who did not respond but simply took the time to read about our experience ... I appreciate you!  This has always been my "Go-To" spot when I need answers, or even simply to vent.  I try to give support and feedback of my own when I can, and I hope that I have helped at least some of you.

Anyway ... we are in full recovery mode, and I feel it's going pretty well.  We still haven't eaten out yet, but I'm sure that time will come.  Until then, things are slowly returning to normal.  HOWEVER ... I feel there is one more step to my recovery, and I am not sure whether it is worth the effort or not.

I would like to write an honest review ... obviously not of the food from the restaurant, which we did not even get to enjoy anyway ... but of their attitude toward food allergies (obviously they are not very educated and/or as careful as they purport to be).  That's the thing ... given that the owner has STILL failed to respond, I have no idea really what happened or how it happened ... I only know that my daughter had an ANA reaction to sesame in the bread, which is what he has reluctantly admitted.

I have done some research on-line at tripadvisor and other sights and have seen other such reviews ... I feel like I owe it to the food allergy community, but I do not want it to come off as vindictive, even though that is what I am sure it is going to seem like to him.  That is why my daughter does not want me to write anything ... she who looked at me with pleading eyes trying to talk me out of even TELLING him what had happened as it was happening ... AS IF! ... for fear of ruining my friendship with him.

So, I wonder ... would it be enough of a benefit for the food allergy community for me to write a review of warning, or would people just see all of the great reviews (of which he has plenty, which is what would make writing this so hard), and disregard my warning.  What do you all think?

Thanks for being here for us

 

So sorry for your experience, so sorry that it was from a friend. Glad your daughter is okay.

 

I'm so sorry, ctm. Nightmares are horrible places to linger. I hope they fade soon so you can begin to find some peace with the events of that day. 

I totally get that, CT.   

Yes, Silver, he did text me the morning after.  I think my big problem is how complacent he was about the whole thing ... even before the reaction and also DURING (when he was trying to tell me that I was just being a neurotic mom!  You think at that point he would have though, "Hmmm ... did I even check these ingredients?  I better do that NOW!").  Also, he was not transparent at all in the aftermath, and we were really freaked out because we figured he had already checked everything and perhaps she had developed a new allergy.  It took me pushing and pushing before I got him to (somewhat) admit that it "could have been the bread and the ccinque cereali flour!"

OMG ... I could KILL him!  Kill!!  These recent fatalities are really tugging at my heartstrings and I am in a really bad place right now, even though I should just be grateful that she is OK.  It's going to take a lot of work for me to move beyond the "what if" that keeps appearing in my nightmares and let go of this.

I am so sorry about her reaction. Relieved she is fine.

It may be that he is afraid of a law suit, but imo that is no reason to be completely rude about it. Did he call to ask how DD was after she went to hospital?

 

So glad she is talking about her feelings with you.  UGH to getting her period!  Poor kiddo.  With time, the memories of the fun you had just might overtake the stress and anxiety of her reaction.

  to you and DD. 

And getting her first period abroad?  Well, for sure she'll never forget it!

I agree, Purple ... it is just so hard for me to fathom his behavior, given our history together.  Suing him would have never entered my mind (not that I am seriously thinking it now, but I can fantasize, right?) if he had just acted more caring and compassionately.

My daughter is doing OK ... thank you for asking!  We are back in our comfort zone, and I think we never really realized how "comforting" our comfort zone was until we actually left.  Granted, we have done a lot of domestic travel in her lifetime, but even trips to the grocery store were stressful abroad.  I can't tell you how many times I would read labels ... in the grocery store, when we were home, and when we were going to consume. 

At one point in the trip, I went to buy some bus tickets, and hubby and two daughters went to the park to have a snack.  I did not know that they were going to eat without me, so when I came back and they were already eating I was a bit upset.  I checked the ingredients in the yogurt again while she was eating it (usually a very safe choice for us), and in my haste did not realize that my phone had autocorrected "nocciolo" (pit) to "nocciolina,"  which is another word for peanut in Italian ... of all things! Gave us both a mini heartattack!! (and this was before her reaction).

As I mentioned, the last few days of our trip were just horrible having to eat out, but we haven't eaten out since we have been home ... two weeks now ... and won't for a while.  She has complained about some leg pain at the 2nd injection site, and I must admit, I was not as gentle.  Also she has complained about dizziness as well, and I have read, both here and elsewhere, that that can follow an episode of ana.  However, she ALSO got her first period while we were in London (OMG!) and so I know that she is just teeming with hormones and that very well could be a reason for her dizziness.

As I said, we are both excited to travel again, and I don't think this episode will hold us back from that.  I will say that I was rather surprised when she came to me today and told me how much it upsets her that when she thinks about the trip, it is hard to separate the good times from this experience.    All I can say is how thankful we are that things turned out the way they did ... not everyone is as lucky.

Not to excuse his lack of communication, but I do suggest he is possibly concerned with a potential lawsuit.  He might not know what to say due to that.  If I remember correctly, a restaurant was recently held responsible for anaphylaxis in England?  Sketchy memory.

I remember a rep from a manufacturer being crushed that my DD had anaphylaxis to one of their products that had been previously safe and he was the original person who told me it was safe.  He spoke to me off the record as he had to be careful and not speak for the company he worked for.

I hope all of you heal in a positive way.  The aftermath is hard too.  How is your daughter doing?

San Crispino!

Oh no!  Wow. I'm glad she's okay, but that sounds awful.




Which gelateria in Rome, if you don't mind my asking?