stinky, you have a really nice approach and I think that helps things. 
I'm happy you're working things out and things seem to be going well. 

I kept saying that DS and I would do the party planning together....and I just didn't get what he was saying....even at parties...NO FOOD!   

Wow-- that is terrific , Stinky!

WTG.   

Met with nurse and teacher last night to finalize the plan....

my communication with the teacher hit him on a very deep level and he has decided that room will be food free - for all events and parties - FOOD FREE.

He has some health issues and he thought about what I said on a deeply personal level and is now refusing to be part of anything that excludes any of the children! 

I'll post the rest of my emails to him later.  He is now an advocate! 

Heh heh. I do have a Human Rights. Campaign in my car. but it's not a Subaru. Yet.

tomato? well my son wouldnt have been able to eat that as well as the cookie.


people have weird ideas sometimes.

Quote from: Macabre on September 14, 2013, 11:00:34 AM
Okay, when I used the word "lust" above, I had no idea that this teacher is actually male.

Just saying.

Waaaaiiittttt  .......are you saying....do you need a rainbow sticker?     You know I drive a Subaru.  xoxo

Quote from: yelloww on September 14, 2013, 10:38:24 AM
TT makes a very good point. This teacher likely isn't versed in privacy for medical issues.....

Generally speaking, most teachers have policies where they won't eat homemade goods. I NEVER EVER eat something that a kid brings in or makes in home ec. No way. That's a food borne illness waiting to happen.

Beyond FA's, if the teacher won't eat it himself/herself, then it shouldn't enter the room. No matter what it is.

Funny Yellow....at old school - same district we (PTSA)  did Potluck lunch for the teachers every month.   Well...maybe skipped a few....each grade took a month - so there were 6 Potlucks...mostly all homemade food.   I always did wacky cake cupcake b/c one of the teachers didn't eat dairy. 

yes...I just edited to add that
I would however like the principal and nurse to address that.....not me

We're in parochial school which open as well but I think for teacher's sake... when you take public dollars you're never 'off duty'.

(wife of public university prof here)

Anyhow, best wishes for a great year and  .

Great points TT.

We've always been open about the allergy, for many reasons and I have had to "nego" food things with other parents.   My community is fairly open to that and very concerned with inclusion (for all things) and such, so it's been mostly very easy.  So it's more about "what can we do together to make this work for everyone".   I've never had to deal with an aggressive parent - and when I've been too busy I just tell the teacher.....here is the bottom line - here is what I'll accept - here is how we'll handle it - but I need you to deal with it.

I am on new ground now, in a new school - same district though. 

I gave the teacher copies of previous letters home that said no food for parties and it was NOT just specific to allergies...other medical issues, economic issues, etc.

I'll make sure to address this with him - I don't mind negotiating with the room moms but I don't want a white hot spotlight on us either.  Although....we could handle it.   

and he should be made aware if he's not already....

What I mean is normally a medical issue is private. You've waived that privacy initially. No judgment from me (I hope that comes through), however if the 504 designation and accommodations are for FA and you've waived at least initial privacy protection if you have any desire for the teacher to not discuss any part of the 504 accommodations openly with other parents in the class he would need to know that explicitly. He sounds like a well intentioned guy who wants to do the job so it's entirely possible his understanding is any part of any FA is fair game for other parents to know.

For instance when a treat is turned away at the door he may say it's because of [name]'s accommodation. Or send parents to you directly to about food.

I don't know what accommodations you'll forge and where your boundaries are about negotiating directly with other parents about food but the teacher at this point only knows that it's thus far an open knowledge policy. *If* any other part of it is off limits for him to discuss openly he most likely will need a hard boundary.

Quote from: Macabre on September 14, 2013, 11:00:34 AM
Okay, when I used the word "lust" above, I had no idea that this teacher is actually male.

Just saying.

In time I will email you a picture...... 

Quote from: twinturbo on September 14, 2013, 10:59:28 AM
With the teacher admitting this is new ground for him on non-food treats to remove exclusion it may be worth explicitly setting some boundaries for him on what he is, and is not, able to discuss with other parents once the new policy kicks in. Considering he is still held to FERPA and a 504 is ensuing it would be fair to him to give him an idea what you consider fair game as open knowledge wrt to protected info so he knows where the boundary lies.

You know, I'm not well versed in FERPA - I have the general idea.   I'll bring it up in the meeting and let the principal and/or nurse address it.   If they can.   

Okay, when I used the word "lust" above, I had no idea that this teacher is actually male.

Just saying.