Would you allow your 14 year old to do this

[littlenuts]

My son (with other health issues) is signed up to attend an event at a major theme park.  I am not invited to attend with him, there will be kids in the group eating peanuts and tree nuts.  There will be chaperones in the park, but not with the kids, the kids are supposed to 'check in' at a table from time to time.

This event is designed to teach the kids to manage their other health issue independently, but is not designed with food allergic reactions in mind. The staff will not be familiar (or with him) to identify or treat a reaction.

I'm trying to decide is this is something I should even consider. His other health issue conflicts with his food allergy, in that treatment for that is often food.

I'm anxious for your thoughts!

[rebekahc]

By the time my kids were 14, yes, I would have let them go.  But we had been transitioning management of their food allergies from us to them for several years at that point.  They both regularly went to Six Flags with groups of friends and no parents/chaperones starting about 7th grade.

My "rules" for them were:
1.  Carry cell phone (in a ziploc if there's a possibility of getting wet).
2.  Carry epi pens.
3.  Only eat approved food (or food from home) and NEVER put anything in your mouth without washing your hands first.  Same as eating anywhere, really.
4.  Make sure at least one friend in the group knows where the epis are.
5.  In addition to the regular emergency plan, let a park worker know ASAP if a reaction starts (a friend should know to do this, too).

WRT kids in the group eating peanuts, etc.  People eat peanuts, etc. in public places all the time, so I always assume surfaces are contaminated to some extent.  If your DS is contact or airborne sensitive, I would probably ask if the small group he's hanging out with could find alternates to nutty foods for snacking - or maybe even bring something tasty and safe to offer (assuming he will hang with a smaller group within the large group of kids going).

[SilverLining]

Please keep in mind, my son does NOT have food allergies. He carries an epi for an insect allergy.

At that age I did allow him a 3 day trip to another city. He was in a room with two other students (no teacher) and each day they had some time unsupervised. That usually included lunch time. Lunch time matters because they were usually grabbing food at outside kiosk-type places, which almost always have bees around them.

I am not saying what you should or shouldn't do, just saying what we did.

~~~

I'm not sure what other types of health issues the kids in your son's group have. Does he have any friends he will be with who would know to call for help or administer an epi-pen? (My son did have a friend trained at the request of the friend and his mom, just because they walked to school every day together.)

Will he have a specific group of friends to be with who would be willing to not eat pb for the day?

[CMdeux]

What R said.

We did allow this with a parent at the same (large) location when DD was 13-14 yo.

On the other hand, the other health condition doubles the risk somewhat, I think-- in terms of "possible incapacity" and need for another aware person to offer assistance. 

Much depends upon past history with both conditions. 

[ninjaroll]

They have a responsibility to be aware of any medical conditions for minors in their custodial duty. Given the medical complexity I would not be able to judge this on a FA-only matrix.

[littlenuts]

Thank you for the replies!

He won't know anyone in this group, it's a first time event for us, hosted by a large support group for kids with diabetes. Yes, CM, he definitely does have an increased risk of being incapacitated, or at least not thinking clearly if he's low. This group of kids will surely be eating peanut butter, it's the go to snack for diabetics 

He is still very sensitive to peanut, has had serious reactions.

The organizer of the event is not receptive to my being there, after my request to be there given all of his issues. She is trying to find a solution for me, while maintaining that this event is focused on independence ( she is not understanding that I'm not as focused as she is on independence) we've had bad experiences in the past at events like this.

[ninjaroll]

His needs vs. her wants. KWIM?

[rebekahc]

Will the group be going to the park when it's open to the public?  If so, then there's really no way she can stop you from just happening to be there, too.  If you go like that, I'd suggest staying near a central location - within a quick run if the phone rings - rather than following DS around.  Alternatively, maybe the organizer would allow him to bring an outside friend that way he's still exercising independence in an age appropriate way (hanging with friends) but with someone who is familiar with his other medical needs.  You could point out to her that the diabetic kids will know what to do and could help in a diabetic emergency, but would be clueless as to his food allergy.  He needs someone who can be that for his food allergy as well.

[CMdeux]

Yup.

[PurpleCat]

both of rebekahc's posts make sense to me and were my thoughts as well.

What does your son think?  Does he want to go?

My DD has been going off on her own to concerts, parks, malls and restaurants with her friends since she was 13.  Her friends are trained to help her with her Auvi Q if needed.  She is also awesome at texting me to keep my stress level in check.

If not one of his friends, can one of the other children on the trip become his buddy and be trained to help him?

[littlenuts]

Thanks everyone, I will speak with the the coordinator to see if anyone is willing to be trained with the epi, but these are strangers to us (and my mind continues to go back to his reaction at school, when those who were trained didn't help) so my trust with people we don't know is at a low level.

My son does want to go, but he doesn't have experience going to events without someone with him, I'm not sure he understands the amount of exposure he'll have. (Also, he hasnt been in school since first grade, so he doesn't have much practice dealing with this alone).

[lakeswimr]

I think you got good advice already.  Could they restrict his group to kids who carry non-peanut foods? 

[Macabre]

The only think I will add is have him carry some wet ones packets. My son has had anaphylaxis twice by picking up on residue at school and accidentally ingesting it. He has also gotten hives at an amusement park by touching rails and such. They resolved with wipes, btw.

However, by 14 we were comfortable letting him do amusement parks with friends. We had also done it with him but separate, ir we were there as a family and let him have a couple of hours on his own (he checked in with Four Square baxk when Itbwas useful at every ride and we also have the Find My Friends app on our phones to identify where we all are). This was in preparation for a school trip to this amusement park a month later--his first without a chaperone for each group. This park was two hours from our house --so a trip.

Since then, we have let him go to park we've not been to (but we're owned by companies we had exoeriese de with).

The Auvis and ohone are kept in buttoned pockets. And the ohone is in a zip lock plastic bag. He has wipes.

But we did work up to that.

I think you have to do what's comfortable for YOUR family.