Bullying at school

[ajasfolks2]

Seems to me that if I were in your shoes -- if did not get SWIFT and CERTAIN answers and action from the VP and interim Prin -- I'd be elevating to Superintendent.

Quickly.

And cc'ing the "safety" assessment branch head (and/or other related) for the district (if one exists).

[Mookie86]

Wow, that kid sounds really out of control.  It does not speak well of the school that they are allowing him to be there day after day while there's repeated physical violence and threats.  I guess those adults shadowing him aren't preventing violence if he's punching people repeatedly during the lunch period.  Maybe you'll get lucky and the kid will be sent to a program for kids with behavioral issues.

I agree that it's time to climb the ladder and take this to the superintendent's office.  You shouldn't have to go to lunch every day.  Your child has the right to feel safe.  This is ay out of hand.  If high-level administration won't do anything, I'd go to the police.

[SilverLining]

Regarding the cell phone, you may have to fight for her to be able to carry it.  My son's school (before he attended) didn't allow students to carry them.  They were to be left in lockers.  I was going to fight with them because part of the reason my son has a phone is because of his allergy.  They changed the rule (prior to me going in, so not because of me) and students can carry phones but they are to be OFF in the school.  If it rings or you are seen using it, they take it away and you have to pick it up end of day at the office.

At 7 the rules (if there is one) may be that students are not allowed to have them.  But, fight them about that if you have to.  Only let her use it for parents, and don't you call her through the day.  That may seem a no-brainer, but lots of parents do call their kids through the school day. 

[hezzier]

I completely understand why kids have to keep the phones turned off, but those few seconds it takes for a phone to turn on are going to seem like a lifetime to a kid having an allergic reaction.

[momma2boys]

What a horrible situation, I'm sorry you aren't getting any help.  I would let the supt. know you are contacting police and/or lawyer if it isn't handled immediately!

Are there any other parents having issues, maybe you can all gang up on the school.

[SilverLining]

I completely understand why kids have to keep the phones turned off, but those few seconds it takes for a phone to turn on are going to seem like a lifetime to a kid having an allergic reaction.

My son leaves his on.  The only time it rang during the school day it was the carrier reminding him he was running low on minutes.  I suggested turning the ringer off through the day, but then he forgets to turn it back up after school, and I freak when I can't get hold of him.

[Carefulmom]

Hk, did you end up giving the school the letter from OCR regarding disability harassment?  If not, I would do that.  Also, I am wondering if this is something that you can contact OCR about?  I see this as a civil rights issue.  Your dd is disabled and therefore, is a protected class.  I see it as no different from being harassed due to ethnic group, religion, etc.   What do you think about calling OCR and seeing what they say?

[hk]

Hk, did you end up giving the school the letter from OCR regarding disability harassment?  If not, I would do that.  Also, I am wondering if this is something that you can contact OCR about?  I see this as a civil rights issue.  Your dd is disabled and therefore, is a protected class.  I see it as no different from being harassed due to ethnic group, religion, etc.   What do you think about calling OCR and seeing what they say?

I have it printed out waiting for the meeting that they still haven't scheduled (requested it Monday, but interim principal started just yesterday).

There is a new (and alarming to me anyway) twist that happened less than an hour ago.  As I mentioned, I've been bringing DD's lunch everyday and staying in the cafeteria during lunch.  The boy tried to steal a Reece's Peanut Butter Cup from someone.  I went over to the assistant principal and said that this kid trying to get possession of something containing nuts needs to be dealt with immediately.  He seemed to think the problem that this kid was trying to steal someone else's food and didn't even get that he could be trying to obtain a weapon to use against my daughter.       Am I totally overreacting to this?  My DH and one of my friends think so (and DH has been pretty good regarding the allergies for the past year or so). 

I said that we were still waiting to schedule the meeting with him and he said he'd get back to me.  I'm willing to give that until tomorrow, but only because I am there most of the time anyway and because I haven't been able to locate a good attorney for this yet (DH is actually working on it).

I'm pretty sure we have a tough road ahead on this one.  The positive side of this is that the school has been pretty good about a lot of things for us - food-free classroom, etc.  It's not enough, but I'm trying to balance it out in my mind.

[SilverLining]

Am I totally overreacting to this? 

NO.  from what I've read here, I don't think you're overreacting.  I think you have shown great restraint.

(But I'm pretty sure my picture is still on a dart board in the staff room where my first two went to school.)

[Mookie86]

This child has a history of physical aggression.  He has made a threat to endanger your child.  No, you are not over-reacting. 

[CMdeux]

Oh--GOSH no. 

I'd be printing out every bullying incident re: food allergy that has EVER hit the news, and then I'd be stapling them together into a dossier for use with the local authorities.

Give the school a deadline for meeting with you to tell you about their plan for protecting your child-- and make it clear that you WILL be contacting the police if they do not do so.

Your child is being threatened and harrassed on the basis of her disability, and also being effectively stalked by someone with a history of violence and aggression.  NO, I do not believe that you are over-reacting.

[Carefulmom]

Still wondering....what about calling OCR?  If they are in agreement with you and are willing to call the school, that would be much cheaper than an attorney.  And maybe more effective.

[YouKnowWho]

I would be less concerned about a cell phone but more concerned with teaching my daughter to get up and walk to the school office when placed in that situation again.  Let them see it, up front and personal - she knows to tell a teacher, hide under the table, etc. 

I have told both boys they can walk out of any situation and straight to the office or nurse and I will take care of the disciplinary action, if any.  Their well-being and health is more important.

[Mfamom]

I would be freaking out!   I think you're right on the money too that he was looking to take that RPBCup for reasons other than him wanting to eat it.
Why, why can't they discipline this child and get the situation under control? 
I would head up the chain of command and demand some action/resolution to the situation.