Science is going to be the death of me

[YouKnowWho]

Why does this have to be a struggle every year?  This whole well he is not allergic to peanuts so he is safe kind of argument.

They are learning about matter this year.  Really the lesson should be why does food matter. 

Teacher decided on a project without consulting me and asked the room mom how to make it safe for DS1.  So she sends out a list of needed ingredients of which none are safe for DS1 and then sends a side note on how to make it safe.

Keep in mind that what I voice here and in hushed whispers after dark conversations is not heard by my son.  He was the one that voiced concerns over last year's 100 day project (each student brought in an assigned gluteny ingredient to mix together and graph - he had his own bag of stuff but that didn't stop them from contaminating the whole classroom).  Real or imagined, he had a tough time staying in class that day (and he has my permission to leave a classroom when he doesn't feel safe, I just have a hard time making him do so because he is a rule follower).  Even in the days following, he didn't want to go into class as a result for fear class was still contaminated. 

I don't egg this on (pardon the pun).  He had legitimate concerns that he voiced on his own.  I want him to do so as he finds his way in the world because I won't always be there to fight for him.  Is there more risk being in the grocery store for him, yes.  He knows that unless it's a quick jaunt that the has to wear a mask because the bakery flour.  When your child looks at you post mask and says "WOW, I feel so much better leaving the store" and he doesn't have a coughing spell post trip, it's like this light goes off.  And yeah, crumbs in a classroom are different than free flowing flour which is where our trips near the bakery are a pita but why would you risk it?

I told the teacher this year at Open House that food allergies are what they are - discuss food projects with me prior and allow me to discuss academics when the time comes.  Guess what?  We are back in the same boat this year where academics take a backseat to food allergies. 

In the last month, I have fielded notes from the room mom about allergies.  Regardless of the fact that she has been the same room mom for the last three years and KNOWS DS1 has allergies, she says stupid things like "Oh DS1 is so good about his allergies, he wouldn't mind being left out."  Did you really just say that to me?  All hell broke loose last Christmas as a result.  Don't piss me off in a season all consumed with food. 

To add insult to injury, teacher wanted me to tell the room mom why the project was canceled.  Umm, would you like me to tell her that you can't listen to simple instructions about consulting me first regarding food in the classroom?  DS1 has a compound word project on Friday - should I attach the word "SCAPEGOAT" to his shirt so you get what you are doing to the child with allergies by asking me to send that email?

Last night I had to go get pretzels at 9pm because sending me an email at 7pm is so 24hrs notice according to his IHP.  At 11pm, she sends me an email about Cinnabon cereal.  Yeah honey, just google the ingredients it has wheat.  So now I have to come up with a suitable alternative.  Did I mention that I don't bake?  Something had to give to come up with meals for a family that is avoiding - gluten, egg, soy, most dried beans, peanuts, etc.  I can't be everything for my family, you want me to do it for you now?

Also in the email - various teachers are doing science projects on Monday but she only knows about one which involves corn starch and water (oh yeah, we have to get brand specific on that one too lady) - can he touch the other projects?  Are you dense?  Unless I have a complete ingredient list of every project how in the hell can I approve it?   

Here we are three years in this school and still no 504.  Our county is supposed to be granting them to those with life threatening allergies but guess what?  It's not happening for those who are allergic to things other than peanut.  The crazy thing?  DS2 who has had contact reactions to peanuts but never a known ingestion reaction, would qualify but DS1 who has had countless ana rxns to wheat, barley and egg does not.  Our hand was forced a few weeks ago on another issue (not FA related) and I finally found an attorney that has been working to fight for 504s in my county.  Someone is about to get spanked 

That's if I survive the stress of the next few weeks......... 

[CMdeux]

Good for you.     <--- spanking tool.